Social skills (or is it) and conversations.

I just realized something That made me really sad.  I always try to get friends but never seem to be able to hold a conversation long enough or there I something else that does not seems right.

Everyone else seems to have a really easy time making friends and approaching people but I just get left out. They seem to know what to talk about, how to keep the conversation going, something I never been good at.

I believe things like these are not so prominent when you're not in school or working a job where you interact. Because you don't socialize with people to the same extent or in the same way when you're by yourself.
When you're by yourself, out of school and work, you're content with being outside a group, you have your own interests and hobbies that you indulge in and you don't interact with people in the same way. But once you enter school, you have to interact, and the difference between you and them uncovers.

It might seems like you're alone at first, but the more I think about it the more I realize that I don't want to be a part of their group (I however do not want to be an outcast either), just talking about things that dosen't really have a meaning? Like social chit-chat, talks about the weather, gossip, bragging about them self and uninteresting things like that. I never really feel inclinced to start a conversation with people like that, because I never feel like they have something important or interesting to say, I also can not relate to anything they speak of.
At least I have important things to say when I open my mouth, I should almost feel sorry for these people for not speaking to me, but they don't know what they're missing. But It is sad that there are so few people that I feel I want to talk to, so few people that I feel have something interesting to teach me or tell me.


PS1. And if this world wasn't so based on social interactions, social skills and how much you interact with others, I would be much better of than them.

PS2. The less energy I use to fit in the better of I would be, since they won't talk to me when I try to act normal, I might as well do all those thing I do when I am by myself, and have them think I am nuts. It would make me have more energy over to focus on stuff that are important, instead of focusing on what they think about me, or why they don't like me.

As Richard Feynman said: What do you care what other people think?


(sorry if this seems incoherent, I forgot to mention I am not good with getting my point across.)

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